Real Estate Listing Words vs What They Actually Mean (Moving Day Edition)

Real estate listings have their own dialect, and it only fully translates once the moving truck is parked outside and the actual dimensions of the place become undeniable. A field guide.

"Cosy"

Translation: the sofa will need to go in at an angle, and there's a real chance the dining table negotiation happens on the footpath before it goes anywhere near the door.

"Character home"

Translation: beautiful, genuinely charming, and also almost certainly a Queenslander with stairs that were built for a smaller, more agile population. Budget extra time — and see our furniture-wrapping guide for the corners that take the most damage on a staircase like this.

"Low-maintenance garden"

Translation: concrete, or close enough to it. Genuinely great news for moving day — nothing to protect, no muddy path, no garden bed casualties from a wide dresser taking a corner too tight.

"Close to everything"

Translation: also close to everyone else trying to park a moving truck on the same street on the same Saturday. Worth checking parking realistically — our guide to Brisbane's trickier streets covers exactly this kind of thing.

"Open plan"

Translation: genuinely great for moving day. Fewer doorways to navigate a sofa through, fewer tight corners, and usually a much faster unload than the listing photos even hinted at.

"Sold as is"

Translation, if you're the one leaving: a genuinely good moment to stop packing and start a garage sale instead for anything not worth the box space.

Whatever the listing said, get a fixed quote based on the reality of the place, not the photos — we've seen every version of "cosy" there is.